Dear all,
Today is Sunday the 13th of September which means I've officially completed my first week in India.
I will be the absolute first to admit that this initial week has been a struggle, and that the next couple of weeks will also be a struggle. Whenever I used to tell people that I was moving to India for a year to work in a school for blind children, they'd look at me with shock or slight apprehension and go 'Gosh, you're so brave!', and I'd shrug it off, thinking that what I was about to do was no big deal. But now I realise that they're right - what I'm doing is brave and it's now occurred to me that I have to become a stronger person than I am to cope with the obstacles I've faced this week. I can, in no way, make a judgement or conclusion of India after only being here a week, and I don't think I'll be able to at the end of the year either.
It really didn't hit me how much I was going to struggle with homesickness and settling in this first week. My mum and my sister dropped me off at Heathrow airport on Friday the 4th, and I was absolutely ready to go, bright pink suitcase in hand and adventure rucksack all packed on my back. As soon as I saw the rest of the India gang sitting on the floor outside Caffe Nero, I knew I was ready, hugged my mum and my sister goodbye and sat down to join in with all the excitement. Checking in? Easy. Security? No problem. Boarding the plane? So much fun. Plane journey it's self? Slept the whole way. Before take off, I read a card that my sister wrote me that said all sorts of lovely and emotional things, and for the first time in the journey I've been planning this, I had a seed of doubt in my stomach. Before I had time to even think about it, the plane sped its way down the runway and all of a sudden I saw the beautiful lights over a London night and I knew, I knew that it was going to be okay.
We landed in Mumbai the next morning. With swollen feet and a puffy face, we were greeted by an intense wall of heat and a complicated flight transfer system, but eventually we were all shoved together on the next plane to Hyderabad, where we were met by our deputy country rep, Abhilash, who bought us all cokes and water and bundled us onto a bus to Hyderabad city centre. Our initial views of India were everything we thought it was going to be - goats in the road, rickshaws dodging in and out of the traffic, six people crammed onto one small motorbike, cars beeping their horns, and an impressive monsoon that made the streets flood. We arrived at a guest house where we were to stay for two nights. Exhausted, jet lagged and in need of a shower, we collapsed in our air conditioned rooms and ate Indian pizza before getting a well deserved twelve hour snooze. The following day we had an all day country orientation with Bharavi, our country host, and got our first taste of spicy Indian cooking. It was so much fun staying in the guest house all together - we even managed to bribe the receptionist for the WiFi password and stayed up late listening to Bonnie Tyler and planning our summer travels. The following morning, my partner Elena and I were put in our first Indian taxi and were driven to Devnar Foundation for the Blind. We got our second glimpse of Indian traffic jams and Hyderabad - a beautiful, diverse and busy city absolutely full to the brim of life, colours, smells and people.
Arriving at Devnar was more overwhelming than I anticipated it to be. When we stepped out the car, we were almost immediately greeted by an army of small children, pulling on our hands and feeling us over where, shouting 'Madam, madam, what is your good name?' and 'Madam, madam, where are you from?'. We met Padma, who is our Indian mummy for the year and our go-to-gal - she's brilliant, always feeding us chocolate and biscuits and making sure we have everything we need. We also met the director of the school and spent the day getting to know our new school and all the staff and pupils. We have a room with two beds, a desk and our own bathroom, with a water supply that cuts out randomly throughout the day (but will always work in the morning for our showers, we've discovered) and only supplies cold water. You'd think that would be nice in the Indian heat, but actually, it's really cold here at the moment! We've decorated our room with photos and fairy lights and unpacked everything to make it feel more like our 'home from home.'
I hadn't anticipated to find it so difficult to settle in this week. I think I had it in my mind that I'd step straight off the plane, head to Devnar, teach my first class and be amazing at it and immediately feel like I was at home. I hadn't taken into consideration that I was going to be teaching blind students who don't speak English. Everywhere we go we are greeted by students feeling our hands and feeling us to work out who were are, then asking a million questions. It's absolutely beautiful to see how much passion and enthusiasm the children have - for learning English, for overcoming the obstacle of being blind and for life. They're extremely intelligent - most can speak Telugu, English and read Braille as well. They walk with their arms around each other to get around, and can easily get from A to B without a problem, shouting 'SIDE' if there's an obstacle. It will never fail to amaze me or surprise me how they differentiate El and I through touch. It's difficult to communicate with the staff or children that don't speak English, but if I've learn anything this week it's that a smile goes a long, long way in tricky situations. We haven't taught many lessons this week, only a few, which mainly consists of LKG (lower kinder garden) who are little rascals but so sweet - we basically just sit and sing songs with them and play with toys, but it's hard to get their attention when we try and teach them something new. I taught one older class all about my home and England, and had to try hard not to well up during the lesson!
I feel so sorry for Elena, who has had to put up with me crying nearly every night this week. Though Devnar is beautiful and the staff are amazing and welcoming, it is a lot to take in in the first week, and on the first night, when we went to sleep in our new home, I suddenly found my self lying awake in the dark and realised that a year, right now, seems like a very, very long time. If I was popping home in a month or two I'd feel completely fine about my current situation - hey, I've only been gone for a week! But the fact that I'm not going to see my family, my friends or the 'normality' that is my life back in England for a year cripples me with homesickness and sadness. I know that in a few weeks I will feel completely settled here and the year will fly by, but right now I'll be honest and admit it's tough. Elena is definitely finding it easier than me - she has the energy and patience to constantly spend time with the children and be adventurous with the food while I wallow in despair in our room and pick at the rice. There's going to be a lot to get used to - teaching, eating with our right hand, looking after ourselves and emerging our self into the Indian culture. I cannot expect everything to happen in the first week - we are here for a year and this is going to take time.
Today is Sunday the 13th of September which means I've officially completed my first week in India.
I will be the absolute first to admit that this initial week has been a struggle, and that the next couple of weeks will also be a struggle. Whenever I used to tell people that I was moving to India for a year to work in a school for blind children, they'd look at me with shock or slight apprehension and go 'Gosh, you're so brave!', and I'd shrug it off, thinking that what I was about to do was no big deal. But now I realise that they're right - what I'm doing is brave and it's now occurred to me that I have to become a stronger person than I am to cope with the obstacles I've faced this week. I can, in no way, make a judgement or conclusion of India after only being here a week, and I don't think I'll be able to at the end of the year either.
It really didn't hit me how much I was going to struggle with homesickness and settling in this first week. My mum and my sister dropped me off at Heathrow airport on Friday the 4th, and I was absolutely ready to go, bright pink suitcase in hand and adventure rucksack all packed on my back. As soon as I saw the rest of the India gang sitting on the floor outside Caffe Nero, I knew I was ready, hugged my mum and my sister goodbye and sat down to join in with all the excitement. Checking in? Easy. Security? No problem. Boarding the plane? So much fun. Plane journey it's self? Slept the whole way. Before take off, I read a card that my sister wrote me that said all sorts of lovely and emotional things, and for the first time in the journey I've been planning this, I had a seed of doubt in my stomach. Before I had time to even think about it, the plane sped its way down the runway and all of a sudden I saw the beautiful lights over a London night and I knew, I knew that it was going to be okay.
We landed in Mumbai the next morning. With swollen feet and a puffy face, we were greeted by an intense wall of heat and a complicated flight transfer system, but eventually we were all shoved together on the next plane to Hyderabad, where we were met by our deputy country rep, Abhilash, who bought us all cokes and water and bundled us onto a bus to Hyderabad city centre. Our initial views of India were everything we thought it was going to be - goats in the road, rickshaws dodging in and out of the traffic, six people crammed onto one small motorbike, cars beeping their horns, and an impressive monsoon that made the streets flood. We arrived at a guest house where we were to stay for two nights. Exhausted, jet lagged and in need of a shower, we collapsed in our air conditioned rooms and ate Indian pizza before getting a well deserved twelve hour snooze. The following day we had an all day country orientation with Bharavi, our country host, and got our first taste of spicy Indian cooking. It was so much fun staying in the guest house all together - we even managed to bribe the receptionist for the WiFi password and stayed up late listening to Bonnie Tyler and planning our summer travels. The following morning, my partner Elena and I were put in our first Indian taxi and were driven to Devnar Foundation for the Blind. We got our second glimpse of Indian traffic jams and Hyderabad - a beautiful, diverse and busy city absolutely full to the brim of life, colours, smells and people.
Hyderabad - India
Arriving at Devnar was more overwhelming than I anticipated it to be. When we stepped out the car, we were almost immediately greeted by an army of small children, pulling on our hands and feeling us over where, shouting 'Madam, madam, what is your good name?' and 'Madam, madam, where are you from?'. We met Padma, who is our Indian mummy for the year and our go-to-gal - she's brilliant, always feeding us chocolate and biscuits and making sure we have everything we need. We also met the director of the school and spent the day getting to know our new school and all the staff and pupils. We have a room with two beds, a desk and our own bathroom, with a water supply that cuts out randomly throughout the day (but will always work in the morning for our showers, we've discovered) and only supplies cold water. You'd think that would be nice in the Indian heat, but actually, it's really cold here at the moment! We've decorated our room with photos and fairy lights and unpacked everything to make it feel more like our 'home from home.'
Our home from home
I hadn't anticipated to find it so difficult to settle in this week. I think I had it in my mind that I'd step straight off the plane, head to Devnar, teach my first class and be amazing at it and immediately feel like I was at home. I hadn't taken into consideration that I was going to be teaching blind students who don't speak English. Everywhere we go we are greeted by students feeling our hands and feeling us to work out who were are, then asking a million questions. It's absolutely beautiful to see how much passion and enthusiasm the children have - for learning English, for overcoming the obstacle of being blind and for life. They're extremely intelligent - most can speak Telugu, English and read Braille as well. They walk with their arms around each other to get around, and can easily get from A to B without a problem, shouting 'SIDE' if there's an obstacle. It will never fail to amaze me or surprise me how they differentiate El and I through touch. It's difficult to communicate with the staff or children that don't speak English, but if I've learn anything this week it's that a smile goes a long, long way in tricky situations. We haven't taught many lessons this week, only a few, which mainly consists of LKG (lower kinder garden) who are little rascals but so sweet - we basically just sit and sing songs with them and play with toys, but it's hard to get their attention when we try and teach them something new. I taught one older class all about my home and England, and had to try hard not to well up during the lesson!
I feel so sorry for Elena, who has had to put up with me crying nearly every night this week. Though Devnar is beautiful and the staff are amazing and welcoming, it is a lot to take in in the first week, and on the first night, when we went to sleep in our new home, I suddenly found my self lying awake in the dark and realised that a year, right now, seems like a very, very long time. If I was popping home in a month or two I'd feel completely fine about my current situation - hey, I've only been gone for a week! But the fact that I'm not going to see my family, my friends or the 'normality' that is my life back in England for a year cripples me with homesickness and sadness. I know that in a few weeks I will feel completely settled here and the year will fly by, but right now I'll be honest and admit it's tough. Elena is definitely finding it easier than me - she has the energy and patience to constantly spend time with the children and be adventurous with the food while I wallow in despair in our room and pick at the rice. There's going to be a lot to get used to - teaching, eating with our right hand, looking after ourselves and emerging our self into the Indian culture. I cannot expect everything to happen in the first week - we are here for a year and this is going to take time.
This is, by no means, a negative outlook of India and my project. It's honesty.
With all that said, I cheered up a little bit yesterday when we got to go and visit the shops down the road for the first time. As we are quite new and Padma is very protective over us, we haven't really been able to leave much, so our outing to the shops was definitely exciting. We got our first sari's for Ganesh festival and a few tunics and trousers to teach in. We also went to the local shop and bought a mop and cleaning products, which to Elena's amusement I am very excited about, as I can finally tackle the grime that has already built up after a week in our bathroom. This morning we were told to wake up at 5am to accompany the children on a school trip to a place called 'HiTech City', which turned out to be this awesome outdoor event in the middle of a blocked off motorway. It involved a lot of dancing, singing, music, and lots of local charities and organisations campaigning for Eco friendly solutions and less pollution, which was awesome to see. The kids from our school performed a dance and sang and played cricked and we raised awareness about the school and what they do. It definitely perked me up a bit - watching a mass crowd of people dance at sunrise was definitely the sort of India I had in mind.
My first sari!
Teaching unfirom
Now back at Devnar, El and I are both taking a day of rest as we have both got our first case of an 'icky Indian stomach and are currently bed bound. Tomorrow is a new day and a new week and I'm trying my absolute hardest to be really positive about it. It's so tempting to sit and countdown the days until I get to go home, but I know that when that day eventually rolls around I'll regret having done so. I think my biggest fear is that life is going to go on without me at home - which of course it will, it's completely natural - but that doesn't stop me being scared of people forgetting me or relationships changing or losing touch with people.
Still, it's all part of the adventure isn't it? Elena said to me the other day that you either need to think big or you need to think small. Thinking big is 'Wow. I'm in India, the country I've wanted to be in since I was a little girl, doing something I've wanted to do for a long time. Isn't this amazing?'. Thinking small is 'Wow, look at that mosquito bite. I should probably do something about that.' It's when you think in the middle of the two that the seeds of doubt start to grow. I think my problem is that I'm thinking too much - I just need to relax and fully immerse my self into my new Indian life. My England life will be there ready and waiting when I get back and I'm sure, to my surprise, that hardly anything will have changed.
Spilling all my feelings out into a blog post has definitely helped, so keep an eye out for regular updates! Tonight, El and I are skyping our country host to organise our October holiday, which may or may not involve staying in a tree house and riding elephants. Excited doesn't cover it!
Thank you for listening to my ramblings once again, and stay updated by liking 'Nomad gone Mad' on Facebook!
Love always,
L x
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